the quiet life

Yesterday Ryan and I took Jameson and went to look at a house for sale.  Its the first house we’ve looked at this year.. which is much more dangerous then it sounds.  We haven’t sold our house, we’ve got a set budget to work with, and a few “wants”.  To find a house that will be the right fit for us could be hard. The house for sale had a huge/private back yard and is on a dead end street.  Quiet.  (A lot of homes in town have no yard and our kids love to run.  If they can’t run outside.. they run inside only inside.  We want a yard).  Besides the yard, I knew I’d like the house (based on pictures) because its an old person home.. which means it has some horrible paint colors, shag carpet, fixtures that need new life, etc..  I love making new life of something old.  I’d call it a hobby.  To top it all off.. there was a laundry chute in the bathroom (yes, please).  It wasn’t a large house.  A bit too small in Ryan’s opinion.. but I like the house.

I finally get how crazy people on the Bachelor or Bachelorette fall in love in such a small window.  When I wrote this post Ryan and I were sharing days that were heavenly.  We slept, had delicious meals, deep uninterrupted conversation, we dressed up a bit and went out every night for dinner.  We were way more affectionate then in our “normal” life. Its easy to love someone in that environment.  (The most stressful part of our day was getting a sunburn).  In real life (today).. loving someone is hard.  I’m reading a book right now that shared an analogy about marriage being an onion where we continually peel back (discover) new layers.  I wouldn’t say that.  I’d say (in our marriage) we see the same layers and somehow expect to peel back and find something new.. surely this time the layer will work better with my own opinion, goals, personality.  Oh, layers don’t change? Yet we’ve pledged to live life together and for each other.  Crazy really.

Ryan is a talker.  For every 10 words I use, he uses 100.  I am sensitive (more sensitive after each child I’ve had). Ryan is not sensitive.  I prefer to stand in the back row.  Ryan likes center stage.

We’re different onions.

The summer is coming to a close and Ryan is finishing the last week of camp this summer (three weeks total).  These were commitments we made quite some time ago when life was different.  Still..  a lot.  Days are a blink… full of fun and exhaustion.  We feel the absence of “dad”.  Craving a quiet life.

*Tonight as I was helping Jameson with his shower he said: “mom.. after Colette is a little older and we have the next baby.. we’ll have six people in this house.  So we definitely will need a bigger house I’d say.”  

The next baby??


2 thoughts on “the quiet life

  1. Oh my. We are in the same boat needing more space. Ari frequently says things that begin with “when we live in the new house…” I’m beginning to doubt that “the new house” actually exists in our world, but the idea of it is hopeful.

  2. I understand totally what you are saying about you and Ryan. Jim and I are so different. Interesting how opposites do attract. We just had a wonderful week together and like you, I am wishing it could be like that all the time, but I know that’s just not realistic. After all, when you are on vacation, you don’t have any stress and all you have to think about is one another. I liked what Ann Romney said in her speech about their marriage. She said, “People say Mitt and I have a storybook marriage; well, that storybook marriage included five boys running around the house yelling and fighting! It also included MS and breast cancer. No, Mitt and I do not have a storybook marriage, we have a REAL marriage!” Yep, that’s what Jim and I have is , a real marriage, and you and Ryan do also. Real marriages are not all flowers, kisses, and romance. They face struggles, issues, and problems, but they can be joyous and fulfilling inspite of the trials.

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